Short And Sweet ?!

Fairy Dumbass heard the Moon had no sole, and decide to provide one...Pity her spelling was not as good as her spells.

This was in reply to the Stony River Microfiction Monday prompt #72.

Twinkle Fish

I took some trash out the other night and saw that someone had just now tossed their Christmas tree. Weird enough. But as I got closer I noticed something dangling from it. And not just one ornament had been left:



I'll resist the urge to editorialize (although it's nearly killing me), but since Fridge Soup is an international collective some of you may be interested to know that Christmas in Florida includes all the decorative trappings found everywhere else: images of Santa Claus, snow, angels, reindeer and - did I mention snow? But this being a place of ocean and sunshine other elements are sometimes thrown into the mix.

Peculiar World Records

 Anyone can establish a World Record.  To become the World Record Holder - at least temporarily - do something really strange and register it.

Here is a selection, video by YouTube.

01.Smiling                               Record: 7 Hours

02. Head butting Watermelons   Record: 40 Melons in 1 Minute

03. Under Water TV Watching   Record: 114 Divers

04. Tallest Hair                        Record: 6 Feet(1.82 Meters)

05. Teeth Coconut Husking        Record: 3 in A minute

06. Longest Finger Nails          Record: 4.8 Feet (1.48 Meters)

07. Loudest Burp                      Record: 110 Decibels

08. Biggest Turban                   Record: 1312 Feet of Cloth

09. Hairiest Ears                       Record: 0.3 Feet (10.2 CM)

10. Longest Milk Squirt With Eye   Record: 9.1 Feet (2.79 Meters)

Google will find many more, I'm sure.
Fridge Soupers with nothing better to do on a Saturday morning might suggest a few of their own.
How about "Quickest solution of Rubik Cube whilst wearing boxing gloves"

Bruce Springsteen - Streets Of Philadelphia

A dozen random thoughts

1. Sometimes, usually on Mondays, I think the Uniform Monday Holiday Act is one of the greatest favors my federal government ever did for me.
2. This winter hasn't been so bad. I just guaranteed a major, major spell of bad weather before it's over.
3. If you should ever have a toenailectomy ask for nonstick dressing.
4. Snow, falling or grounded, is more breathtaking when going out into it is optional.
5. I check my email at least 80% more often than is necessary.
6. I have received some gifts that I treasure although I have never made use of them. A beautiful blank-paged book covered in silky, vibrant colors and a quill pen are among them.
7. It never fails that I build up the wood fire and don a fleece top within the same hour, and then sweat until the fire dies down. I rarely change that one article of clothing.
8. Chocolate covered strawberries should be stored in the refrigerator and brought to room temperature before eating. 
9. A temporary facial tic, near one's eye, for example, is never so apparent to other people as it feels from the inside.
10. The novels that I read affect how I conduct my life. Yesterday I read the last page of Gap Creek and mopped all the downstairs floors. I should read more books that detail hard work and an accepting attitude toward it.
11. I am glad I began using moisturizer around my eyes in my twenties, long before I needed it.
12. One should never climb up a stool or ladder to see how dirty the tops of tall things are unless one is also prepared to undertake the cleaning of those surfaces.

Reasons for Mortality

During the week which ended on the 17th Feb. in 1719, the following diseases and conditions (among others) proved fatal to the inhabitants of London.

Aged  49

Chrisoms  1

Colick  2

Consumption  50

Convulsions  139

Dropsie  28

The King's Evil  2

Fever  51

The French Pox  2

Gout  1

Griping in the Guts  20

Headmouldshot  2

Jaundies  3

The Imposthume  2

Mortification  2

Rising in the Lights  5

The Small Pox  55

Sore Leg  1

Stoppage in the Stomach  5

Suddenly  4

Of their Teeth  43

Thrush  1

The Tissick  8

Twisting in the Guts  2

Tympany  1

Worms  1

Executed  4

                         

One Less Thing To Worry About

Since I've been under strict orders to reduce my cholesterol intake , I read the labels on everything .

Given a return to "icy conditions" forecast for next week , I stocked up again and was pleased to see that my new supply of salt to put on the footpath is fat-free . No carbohydrate or protein either .

Such a relief .

Random Thoughts

On seeing this illustration by Jutta Ash, which appeared as a Monday's Child prompt today, I let the following Random Thoughts flow. Because of the culinary theme, I thought 'What better place to post them than Fridge Soup?'

Cake, Anyone?

A bird in the kitchen?
I wonder which 'un
would cook, cock or hen?
But then again,
a three tier cake
might make any bird quake
and shake their feathers.
It depends whether
they were Cordon Bleu standard,
as well as surehanded.
for piping
icing
isn't easy
peasy...

P.S. - I think this should go in here as a comment in honour of the 14th....

Just in Time for St. Valentine's Day

 According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a woman is her eyes.

According to the same survey,  women say the first thing they notice about men is that they’re a bunch of liars.

 

Frog Leap Puzzle

You might have seen this Frog Leap Test. A friend sent it to me last Sunday. It was driving her crazy and she wanted me in the passenger seat losing my mind right along with her.

Try it. My theory is that the younger your brain is the easier it will be for you to get the frogs all to change places. Alternatively, if your brain works the way the brains of second graders in China do, you'll do fine.

I managed it twice, and couldn't figure out how I had done it.

If you find yourself obsessing (as I did) here's the solution: 

Frog Leap Solution

...which I had to watch innumerable times to reproduce it.

Anniversary Soup?

Soup Du Jour

Friko is our Master Chef -
but you won't see her on telly.
She won't allow us kitchen staff
to cook up vermicelli,
only lots of different soups,
to fill each hungry belly.

We've kept the tables turning now
for one year and three days,
and managed to have lots of laughs
in various odd ways.

We really are a motley crew,
of that there is no doubt,
but  when we get into a stew,
she comes and pulls us out! 
With cryptic quips and other tricks
she keeps us in our places -
as long as we behave ourselves,
and don't kick off our traces.

Long may Soup continue
to be our daily fare,
because it really is the best
that you'll find anywhere!

From your Admin Department

some fridge soup stats:

We were one year old on Feb 2nd and we have posted 335 posts,
I never thought we'd last this long.

Congratulations are in order.
Jinksy, could we have an anniversary ditty from the Fridge Soup Poet Laureate?

Triple Negatives = One Positive?

I have a thing about grammar.
These things just hit me, whether I want to or not; people do it deliberately, they shout when they pass me in the street;  I simply cannot fail to hear every word they say.
It really isn't my fault.

A girl telling her friend that her boyfriend has got off benefits and into a paid job, which she finds good, because now "he ain't got to sit at home not doin' nothin'.

A girl telling her friend about her plans for Christmas: " No way I ain't goin' to no bleedin' carol service".