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Thursday, 1 April 2010

Friends, Romans, Countrymen...

Before Blogger has the entire Soup Fraternity poured down the drain as unfit for human consumption- or should that be Sorority/Fraternity to be politically correct? -may I suggest we turn our thoughts to a more innocent pastime, and create ourselves CV's in order to be able to justify our continuing membership of this elite club.
I have been asked to give you mine, as an example:-

  • Many years travelling the world on an exercise bike got her precisely nowhere, but developed muscle tone in very unexpected places. Diagram available upon request.
  • Had aspirations of becoming a painter, until all supplies of red pigment dried up following town refurbishment embarked upon in her youth.
  • Cooking establishments welcomed her but cut backs on the chopping block made her redundant, following shortage of extra phalanges.
  • In the manufacturing industry, her mechanical skills were invaluable, for she ran a well oiled machine that worked like clockwork. Sadly, once she lost the wind up key, production output fell to an all time low,and the factory could no longer afford to supply her with WD40.
  • Can be guaranteed to infect any gathering with rampant giggling virus, as yet unclassified by the scientific world. May have originated off planet, but not sure which one.