Wrinkles I can cope with. The lines around my mouth are laughter lines, I tell myself. Increasing eye bags I can cope with. I work hard, I tell myself. On retirement, these will fade (ever the optimist).
But, this morning, I noticed that I now have a vertical line leading up from between my eyes up my forehead. It is dead straight, and divides my forehead in half. I'm presuming that if I frown it becomes even more pronounced, like a furrow in a farmer's field, and am avoiding mirrors for the moment.
The even bigger problem is that the line divides my face so well into two that it accentuates the fact that I am not symmetrical. One eye is bigger than the other. My nose is slightly to the left of centre. There is more lip on the right than on the left.
I am wonky. And now I have a line to prove it.
What makes it even worse is that I wasn't even looking in a mirror when I spotted the line this morning. I was at the bus stop (this won't surprise some of you), peering at the timetable, when suddenly I caught my reflection in the glass. Aaarrrggghhh! The people driving past would have been most intrigued as to why I kept backing off from the timetable, then cautiously moving forward again, then pulling at my forehead with both hands, then standing well clear of the bus stop until the bus came.
Sigh.
The Extraordinary Dandelion
11 hours ago
Maybe a red circle such as those that beautiful Indian women wear. Circles are kinder than straight lines and no needles required as for Botox. Make up the legend of your choice, to go with.
ReplyDeleteI'd go for a colourful, hippy headband. That way, your forehead will be totally line free - central or not!
ReplyDeleteBig sympathy - been there (not at the bus timetable, but in a store window 'YIKES who is that wrinkled woman?'
ReplyDeleteThe great unfairness about it all is that I have never, ever smoked, but have all the horrible little wrinkles around my lips that are usually the sign of a lifetime smoker.
Turn you back on growing old gracefully! I am going to go under the knife as often, and as long as I can afford it....... not had any yet, so not doing well in terms of achieving this particular goal.
ReplyDeleteThree thoughts in response:
ReplyDelete1. I like to think of those things as Things That Make A Face Interesting. I have had a between-the-eyebrows vertical furrow since my 20s.
2. One of the good things about being fat is that it plumps out the face so other wrinkles don't appear.
3. Twelve years ago we moved into this house. I had no full-length mirrors and didn't want them. I never saw myself from the bust down. Imagine my shock when I went into a store dressing room and saw how large everything else had become!
There's always the Scotch Tape Frown Reminder. You know, where you paste tape across your furrows - a kind of behaviour mod treatment for the forehead. My mother used to do that back in the day, but I think she gave it up after leaving the house and forgetting to remove it one too many times.
ReplyDeleteI think we should start another new blog where we can moan about getting older.
Such good suggestions so far that I've decided to implement as many as I can together. The red circle-hippy headband-Scotch tape look is definitely the new black. It looks great. At least, I think it does. I have taken all the mirrors down.
ReplyDeleteOh Girls!!!There's an age when it matters and later an age when it doesn't.I'm in transition,amazed at where those lines came from since yesterday, trying not to care and wishing I looked like Judi Dench.
ReplyDeleteFran, you should patent that new look quickly - it could catch on!
ReplyDeleteJinksy - it has. Can't get the damn stuff off my head now. Must have been good Scotch tape. How am I meant to shower?
ReplyDeleteTry out Furlesse for your furrows! I just launched my new product 2 days ago. It's a form fitted patch, made out of a medical grade adhesive, that is easy to apply and take off in the morning. I wake up to nice smooth skin! www.furlesse.com
ReplyDelete